Not Love

How things have changed
Not like they used to be
I thought you were
What I needed
To fill the emptiness inside
You were that ideal
My dream
But damn I was wrong
I lifted you up so high
Didn't see the cracks
The flaws in your smile
You were that shining star to my heart
But all I got
Was fucked over
Broken heart
Smashed to the ground
The disappointment
Its too much
Too hard
To accept
That I was not enough
For you
That you were not
What I wanted you to be
I put myself out there
For you
You made me feel
That something special
But it was all a fantasy
That you could not fulfill
You were there
But not
I almost said it
I loved you
But you never could
Be my love
Not completely
I look at it all
Now
You've moved on
I live on
Keep myself busy
But every now and then
You pop up
The feelings roll in
Anger creeps through my veins
A smile a cross my lips
Confusion sets in
I just want it to be over
To find that peace
It alludes me
You just continue
To haunt me
I know that its not love
Not love at all
Holding on
To what you were
What we were
In my head
How it made me feel
But its not worth
Time spent on an illusion
I want to be free
Of it all
And finally
Of  you
Cause its not love
Not love at all
Its over...